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Pregnancy

If you are facing a decision about a pregnancy that was not planned, you may be feeling……

• Shocked and numbed
• Frightened
• Angry that this has happened
• That it is not really happening to you
• A mixture of different emotions

These are all very normal reactions.

There are three options open to you:

1. Carrying the pregnancy to term and keeping the baby.
2. Carrying the pregnancy to term and having the baby adopted.
3. Terminating the pregnancy.

To help you make the best decision:

• Try not to make your decision alone. If you have a partner try to talk about your options together.
• You might find it helpful to talk to a Counsellor - someone who is not closely involved in your decision.
• Look carefully at all the options available to you.
• Listen honestly to your feelings and try to understand them.

Carrying the pregnancy to term and keeping the baby

If you decide to have the baby you may feel……

• Relief that you have made a decision
• Nervous about labour
• Apprehensive about how your life will change with a child
• Uncertainty about how you will cope finacially and emotionally
• Worried about how caring for a child will affect your studies
• Pressured by the cost and availability of childcare

These are all normal concerns.

It may help to talk about some of your feelings with a counsellor.

The following agencies can give you practical information:

• AUSA Office 50/52 College Bounds, Tel (01224) 272965
• Grampian Welfare Rights, Tel (01224) 643747
• Dept of Social Services, Tel (01224) 589988/636411
• Social Work Department, Tel (01224) 276276

Carrying the pregnancy to term and having the baby adopted

If you decide to place the baby for adoption you may feel…..

• Relief that you have made a decision
• Nervous about labour
• Worried about how you will feel about giving up the child
• Concerned about all the practical details
• Worried about the future having given up a child

These too are normal feelings and it may help to talk them over with a Counsellor.

The following agencies may also be able to help:

• Social Work Dep at the Hospital, Tel (01224) 681818
• Voluntary Service Aberdeen, Tel (01224) 586395

Terminating the Pregnancy

If you decide to seek a termination of the pregnancy you may feel a range of emotions….

• Relief that you have made a decision
• Guilt about the decision you have made
• Worried about what might be involved

These are very normal feelings.

A doctor will explain the medical procedure to you. A Counsellor can give you time to talk about your feelings and any worries you might have.

After a termination you might feel…..

• Relief that you are no longer pregnant
• Stronger an more in control of your life
• A sense of grief or loss
• Guilt for ending a potential life
• Guilt for not wanting a child
• Anger at a partner
• Fear that you will be punished in some way

Your reactions may depend on your beliefs, life experience, your personality and the support you have been given. Feelings change over time and you might find it helpful to talk about them with a Counsellor.

You do not have to face up to your decision alone. You might find it helpful to talk to:

• A partner
• Family
• Friends
• Your doctor
• Your adviser of studies
• A warden or sub warden
• University chaplain
• Welfare officer at SRC
• Counselling Service

An appointment with the Counselling Service can be easily arranged by calling in at the office or emailing us at counselling@abdn.ac.uk , or call us on (01224) 272139.

These books may also be helpful:

• 'Understanding Abortion' by Mary Pipes
• 'Mixed Feeling' by Angela Neustatter
• 'Coping with Abortion' by Alison Frater & Cathy Wright

All are available for loan from the Counselling Service.

More information is available on the links page.